Culture / Humor / Politics

Gun Appreciation Day

This January 19th, mark you calendars for the first inaugural “Gun Appreciation Day“, a day to celebrate our nation’s rabid and hysterical committment to upholding the Second Amendment of our Constitution, even as the rest of the Good Book is left to deteriorate. The event is scheduled to coincide with Obama’s inauguration and to protest Vice President Biden’s recommendations for possible new gun control laws following the recent spat of mass shootings.

The website for Gun Appreciation Day calls for supporters of the Second Amendment to show up to “your local gun store, gun range or gun show with your Constitution, American flags and your ‘Hands off my Guns’ sign” to send a message to Congress and the White House that you will not surrender your right to bear arms. And you know what, I agree with them. I rarely leave my house without my arms and I don’t look forward to a day where I am told that I have to. Here is a recent picture of me displaying my American Pride (U.S.A. #1!!!) and my constitutionally granted right to bear arms: 

 bearing arms

Our socialist president Barack Hussein Obama has stuck his big-government, socialist hands into one too many things. First, he tried to tell us that we should all be allowed to go to the doctor when we’re sick and that the government will help us with the cost (pfft!). Then he and his Commie cronies tried to get their paws into our Medicare! Government-run Medicare? Can you imagine such a thing?!

Now Obama is saying that he wants stricter gun control regulations like more thorough background checks for potential mental illnesses. He also suggested a ban on assault weapons and high-capacity ammunition clips. I think this meme from the Gun Appreciation Day web site says it all:

 EXACTLY! If you haven’t been in your share of gun fights like myself and my other gun-loving friends out there, you can’t possibly know how many rounds you might need to fight bad guys. I myself have been in many gun fights and I’ll tell you this: ninjas NEVER attack alone. They attack in gaggles of at least 30 or more. Thank God I’m always packing  clips with a minimum of one billion rounds or we would be in some real trouble! 

And let’s not call them “assault weapons” because, honestly, that’s entirely misleading. ANYTHING can be an assault weapon, including my cat, jello, beanie babies, and, worst of all, a pencil. pencilI mean, you have no idea what I can do with a pencil. It is sick and disturbing and I won’t even explain it. Suffice it to say that I’d rather an oozie in the hands of my enemy than fully loaded Number 2 lead pencil. Those babies are dangerous! If Big Government is going to regulate something, they should first look to the menace that is laying dormant in schools and libraries all over the country, ready to attack at any moment.

There are so many great reasons to bear arms in this country. Government tyrants, civil war, the apocalypse, the Second Coming, Zombies. Bottom line: we need to be prepared. You never know what crazy plans the government is concocting to take over the world.

I did not make this up. It is on the Gun Appreciation Day website. Also, I don’t know why that one zombie is wearing a top hat.

  

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8 thoughts on “Gun Appreciation Day

  1. Great article as usual. This shows that the power of words are even more dangerous than any gun, assault weapon, or a No. 2 lead pencil. My better half also mentions that 6″ stiletto heels also can be quite lethal in the wrong hands! BAN STILETTO HEELS NOW! Well done!

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  4. It is worth noting that the NRA consistently uses the somewhat quaint Hollywood movie terms “good guys and bad guys” in their ongoing appeal for a paranoid armed-to-the-teeth society. And since Wayne La Pierre looks for all the world like the sadistic Ronald Lacey nazi character in “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” a classic movie villain or Bad Guy if there ever was one, we would do well to think about who’s kidding who here, or better yet, who really is who.

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  5. Those who go for more gun control will live to regret it. Where I live “home invasions” are up 76%, and Police response time is 3 days to a week for an assault & home break-in & robbery, or assault. Obama has instituted the cuts that will make things even worse, because of an out of control Congress & Senate. Please people, see the handwriting on the wall. Mass shootings are a result of the oppression that the people are feeling, and the sickness that has come over America because of corporate oppression & robbery. We have always had M1Garands 20 shot semi-automatic, M1 carbines 20 shot semi-automatic since WW11, and NO ONE has gone around mass killing people in the 60’s 70’s, 80’s etc. Not to mention all the people who own fully automatic machine guns. Why are they doing so NOW? Do Not let yourself be terrorized into giving up your only tool of protection & freedom. Obama is a terrorist, and the most mass murdering president & most oppressive president on the middle class we have ever had. Do you really think NOW is a good time to disarm?

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